Adulation- Servile flattery; exaggerated and hypocritical praise
I can already feel the waves of eyes fixated on my being as I walked down the street. Without needing to look up I knew instantly what they were looking at. It didn’t help that they were trying so hard to not have a tumult of the whispering they permeated through the air. After all, any little matter can consume to become larger, that much was obvious in the law of the world, and that much was obvious when it came to how I came to this position. I never asked to be put here, nor would my cries of being put here be answered by anyone of any importance. After all, anyone of any importance would know that my wishes to be completely foolish and more akin to a folly than any legitimate concern of my well being. Those who need almost never get what they want, and those who want never appreciate what they need. I almost laugh when I feel the thousands of eyes, the millions of minds, and the billions of ears that I reach with my childish games. Sometimes I wonder if I am worthy of even a tinge of praise, if anything that I do ever actually means anything. Sometimes I wonder if I can even call what I do an art form, or a blatant exploit of the system known as entertainment. Sometimes I wonder if I would have been happier not knowing. They say ignorance is bliss, but I’ve come to know ignorance as a necessity. The world needs people caged up behind a dark echoing wall. I’m far too timid to receive such noise around my existence. I don’t need the lenses, the pens, or the mind of day to be given to me. I just wish to live in my own quite abode. And walking now, I begin to wonder if that possibility had ever even been possible for me.