Felicity

Felicity: State of well-being characterized by contentment

Are you happy? She asked me. I nodded, trying my best to reassure myself that I was indeed in a state of happiness. I never thought I would be, I replied. Well it’s good that you are now, she said. I smiled. It was indeed good that I was happy. I had never been happy before, never have I been able to say I was happy with full honesty. Never have I been able to smile so genuinely before. But, even as I say I am happy, and even as I stride with steps filled with energy because of that happiness, somewhere in me, it hurts. It hurts to be happy, because no matter what, to be happy, someone else cannot. I am happy, and I walk with a spring in my steps that I never had before, but it is all because of that fact that I am unhappy. It is for the same reason that I am sad that I am happy. I’ve never been this happy, and sad at the same time, I told her. She asked me why. I simply looked ahead, looking into her eyes, looking somewhere beyond that, and smiled. If I told you, I wouldn’t be happy.

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